Does She Dive?
May 13th 2004
Today I spent the day staring at bubbles as they came bursting to the surface. My objective, even as I was lost in thought, was to be the best possible tender. I wanted to be able to anticipate the diver’s every need, to give slack as slack was needed and to gently guide it back when it was time for him to head back in.

I wanted to be able to write longer chapters in my journal, perhaps little stories that could stand on their own but I come home and stare at the notebook instead. Words avoid me sometimes, and more often than not I am the one avoiding the notebook. Where to start for that day? What do I tell first?
How about this for starters? I overhear this, it was said loud enough for me to hear but still spoken as if I weren’t there.
“Are they all divers?”
“Yeah I think.”
“All of them, or does she just tend?”

This conversation is also very real.
“Are you guys divers?” Someone at the plant we are working at asks our crew.
“Yes.” One of the guys or the foreman will answer.
“All of you?” At which point as if the question wasn’t obvious enough one or all of the questioners will look in my direction.
“Yeah.” I know sooner or later this gets old, but you know this first response is never convincing enough so 90% of the time now looking directly at me but still asking one of the guys the man will persist.
“Does she dive?”
“Yeah.”
Eventually I took to ignoring them completely. At first I was worried that I was coming off as arrogant or stuck-up but what did it matter if they all treated me as if I was deaf anyway? I might as well be deaf.
Just a couple of days ago our plant contact asked me this directly (for a change).
“How come you never dive?” What made him come to that conclusion? You know what was the worst part? The day I dove he wasn’t there! Regardless, what kind of answer did he expect from me? What was he thinking when he asked that question?
“Gee sir, I don’t dive because I don’t have the experience or the balls. Ha ha.” But that one doesn’t work because I have about as much experience as half the crew there. “I’m just a really really good tender.” I could say but don’t you think that perhaps the correct answer could have been “I don’t dive because I’m a girl and girls don’t dive.” Sometimes I’ve been tempted to just respond with a completely absurd statement when asked if I am a diver.
“Are you really a diver?”
“No, actually I’m just their fan base. I tend them and service them. Oh, I also pick up their lunches and laundry.”
This because I have actually done laundry and lunch pick ups. On one job I was half way down to the shop to pick up a particular torque wrench when I was called back. After I turned around and walked the distance back to the foreman he pulled some bills out of his pocket and handed them to me. “Why don’t you get the me and the guys some sandwiches instead.” Would you be furious or just mildly annoyed? I was a bit of both but mostly surprised, yet that day I knew enough to keep my big mouth shut. I let the simmer die down, but not before one of the divers, with whom I was close friends noticed.
“Are you annoyed at that?” he asked. There was genuine concern in his expression. I trusted him so I was honest in my reply.
“Hell yeah, but I’ll get over it.” I didn’t consider what had just happened as a big deal. All this time I still don’t know what moves men to do or say half of what they do and say. I have no understanding of what their convoluted idea of honor and respect is all about, but I knew enough to understand that this was one of those things you just need to let go of and eventually it will be dropped and forgotten. Sadly, the guy I trusted told the foreman. I want to think that he did it because he thought he might help me, I don’t want to think that he was just being a gossip. My foreman on this particular job, being the possessor of the coldest blue eyes ever seen looked me straight in the face and said:
“If you have a problem you need to come to me. You need to tell me. I heard what I did bothered you.”
“Whoever told you had no business telling you.”
“No. You need to tell me.”
I smiled as if nothing but I was thinking “If you knew this would be cause for bother why did you do it?”
Why do they do it? What answer do I give to “How come you never dive?”

So I am back working on night shift. I'll work on tis post as time permits; it'll be more like a notebook. I was very awake at 1330 but had bad cramps so I took something for it, used a heat pad, laid down and watched a little of a tv show on my laptop and all that together made me sleepy and groggy by the time my alarm went off at 1540. So that means I am cloudy minded now.
I'm working at Dresden. Boy this plant has some real issues and yet it is one of my favorites to work at. Ashlee, the other diver, was here earlier in the year and all she could say about Dresden was how dirty it is. I don't remember if she was in the CA, I think she may just have been working in the screen house and walking through the plant, but either way I guess she's right. And still this is one of my favorite plants to work in. Watch me jinx myself for this job by saying that.
Why I mention Dresden and its issues though, is because every outage I've been at in the last two years (that makes four here) there have been the craziest memos going out.
Like the one about how deer hunting (with bow and arrow) should be allowed in the grounds. This was because the person who wrote it had hit a deer on the way in. Now, let's look at this a little better: if he was past the entry gate and around the parking lots (where the deer usually hang out and eat) he should not drive faster than 15 miles per hour! How do you hit a deer at that speed unless you really want to? If he is coming to the plant but before the guard house, then the speed is about 35-45 miles per hour, about the speeds you'll find in your own town's streets, where a child could run out in front of your car and, knowing this you drive carefully (I hope). Knowing there are deer in the area at given times, I try to drive carefully too. I don't know about you, but having to dodge arrows in the parking lot on my way to work seems a little worse than having to drive slowly to avoid hitting a deer!!
There's the memo last year, about people smearing shit on the walls of the temporary bathroom trailers set up for the contractors. Wow...... this in a power plant. I don't need to say more. It speaks for itself.
This year there were two memos a few days apart: memo 1) a fridge was stolen from a lunch area!!! How does a FRIDGE get stolen INSIDE a power plant that has the highest security possible going in and out, especially when your vehicle gets searched on the way out of the Controlled area. This area has people hanging around practically 24 hours a day! A few days later a memo was posted about the bad attitude and rudeness of certain people.
All in a day's work in the nuclear field.... makes you think doesn't it?